Lebanon Reporter


September 18, 2012

Standing room only


When Mary Ellen got home, I bragged about the bathroom renovation, and told her that this week I was going to write my column on the new toilet seat.

“Don’t you think you’d be more comfortable sitting at the computer desk?” she asked.

I called my friend Bob and asked him to stop by so he would have a chance to see my handiwork. When he arrived, I offered him an ice cold beer. But he wasn’t biting ... or drinking.

“I’m way ahead of you, Dick. I ran into Mary Ellen at the drugstore yesterday and she told me you’d probably want me to come over to admire your accomplishment. Your aim is just to get me to use your new facilities, right?”

“Bob, just get in there and worry about your own aim.”

Then Bob — just to drive me crazy — finished his beer and quickly left to go home. I don’t know when anyone else is going to stop by our place. I guess I have to be patient … and will try to sit tight.

Text Only

Featured items
Click below to browse and order photos

Photos from June 2014

Twitter Updates
Follow us on twitter
AP Video
Texas Scientists Study Ebola Virus Smartphone Powered Paper Plane Debuts at Airshow Southern Accent Reduction Class Cancelled in TN Raw: Deadly Landslide Hits Indian Village Obama Chides House GOP for Pursuing Lawsuit New Bill Aims to Curb Sexual Assault on Campus Russia Counts Cost of New US, EU Sanctions 3Doodler Bring 3-D Printing to Your Hand Six PA Cops Indicted for Robbing Drug Dealers Britain Testing Driverless Cars on Roadways Raw: Thousands Flocking to German Crop Circle At Least 20 Chikungunya Cases in New Jersey Raw: Obama Eats Ribs in Kansas City In Virginia, the Rise of a New Space Coast Raw: Otters Enjoy Water Slides at Japan Zoo NCAA Settles Head-injury Suit, Will Change Rules Raw: Amphibious Landing Practice in Hawaii Raw: Weapons Fire Hits UN School in Gaza Raw: Rocket Launches Into Space With Cargo Ship Broken Water Main Floods UCLA

Click HERE to read all your Parade favorites including Hollywood Wire, Celebrity interviews and photo galleries, Food recipes and cooking tips, Games and lots more.
Hyperlocal Search
Premier Guide
Find a business

Walking Fingers
Maps, Menus, Store hours, Coupons, and more...
Premier Guide