When I was in seventh grade we circulated a petition asking one of our lunch ladies to try different deodorant, and while we generated some much needed hygienic awareness amongst many classmates and picked up a lot of signatures, we also got detention, stern lectures from both administration and our parents, as well as the coldest hamburgers you could imagine.
So when I received a request recently to sign a petition to “Save Wrigley Field,” I was somewhat confused. After all, Wrigley does predate the discovery of dirt, so what could it possibly need saving from?
Cubs ownership wants to institute $500 million in renovations to Wrigley. This demand has sparked a wrestling match between rooftop owners, one crabby Alderman, the Landmarks Commission and the Mayor of Chicago. According to plans, the exterior will be restored to 1938 status, a year the Cubs were swept in the World Series - which is in itself surprising on multiple levels.
Wrigley is already a local landmark, but will work to achieve National Landmark Status while implementing the renovations simultaneously. The most impressive aspect of the project is that it will all be done with private money.
But as negotiations floundered, Tom Ricketts knew the trump card lay in the pocket of his David Beckham Collection, double breasted, Armani suit lined with the fur of the rare and endangered Pamir Spotted Zebra all along.
But does Ricketts really want to go down in history as the man who tore down Wrigley? Did he pay $900 million for the team just to have the chance at writing an even darker chapter of history in what has already been a genuinely lackluster and laughable existence?
I suppose it’s fitting the Ricketts and the Cubs found each other considering the Ricketts family is ranked 371 out of the 400 Wealthiest People according to Forbes. This of course places them near last on the list and that’s where the team has been languishing since the day the Ricketts bought them.