Published: August 19, 2008 10:59 am            

Bigfoot follies

The entire world waited breathlessly to hear about the recent ‘proof’ announced by three Bigfoot hunters who claim to have found an actual corpse of the mythical creature.

After their press conference on Aug. 15 in Palo Alto, Calif., the resounding answer was “huh?”

Two men, Matthew Whitton and Rick Dyer, claim to have found the dead Bigfoot while hiking in northern Georgia. In announcing the find, they have partnered with Tom Biscardi, president of Searching for Bigfoot Inc., whose credibility is described in less than glowing terms by “serious” researchers of the topic.

The press conference turned out to be more poof! than proof. The only corpse was a photograph while copies of a DNA analysis on the remains revealed that of three tissues samples, one was unusable, one was human and a third tested 96 percent positive for American opossum. The group explained that the Bigfoot had obviously been snacking on opossum prior to its demise.

What was revealed during the conference was the fact that the men are trying to make a pile of money from their find and the international media exposure it has generated. Their Web site, which will not be listed here to avoid giving further free publicity, sells all manner of do-dads including baseball caps, belt buckles and videos of the creature.

According to several Internet bloggers, still frame captures from video that purports to show a live Bigfoot in the area of the corpse strongly resemble a popular commercial Bigfoot costume.

So, is Bigfoot alive? We agree that the possibility exists.

Did this motley crew of adventurers find a dead one? Not likely, in our unscientific opinion.

Are they generating more publicity for their Web site than money could possibly buy? Certainly!

Is the spirit of P.T. Barnum alive and well in our country? Absolutely!

One editorial note: As we certainly don’t want to be painted as a complete skeptic, hereafter, all mention of Sasquatch in this column will refer to “that mythical half-man, half-opossum, creature of the wilderness.”

SQUIRREL SEASON — I was dumbfounded today when someone mentioned that squirrel hunting season has arrived.

Aug. 15 was the opening date, and though I realize a few intrepid hunters typically venture forth, it is usually hotter than the proverbial hinges of Hades on opening day. However, the weather of late has been wonderfully and unseasonably cool, making a morning stalk in the woods tomorrow a distinct possibility.

I’ll call a press conference to let you know if we get any squirrels or a decaying Bigfoot carcass.

INTERESTING POLITICAL NEWS: While hunters aren’t clamoring for an audience with Barack Obama, many of them might vote for the Illinois Senator for President.

According to a poll just released by the Congressional Sportsman’s Foundation, John McCain is ahead among hunters who vote by a 45 to 31 percent margin. While that is relatively good news for Republicans, the interesting point is that it is only half the lead that George Bush had over John Kerry in 2004 and far short of the 65-point lead Bush had over Al Gore in 2000 among gun owners.

What does this mean? According to most analysts, McCain hasn’t proven to hunters and second-amendment supporters that he could be considered a staunch ally of gun rights. We can speak from experience that many acquaintances from the extraordinarily pro-gun state of Arizona have few good words for McCain, their senator of many years. One writer said that McCain has had an "up and down" relationship with gun owners for many years. We would agree.

Obama, who is from the robustly anti-gun upstate area often called “the People’s Republic of Illinois,” is trying to soften his appearance to second amendment supporters. So far, he has been exceedingly bland on gun-control issues.

What is our take? Neither candidate would appear to be especially helpful to gun owners and hunters, though I suppose that general Democratic doctrine would make Obama the more likely to pursue a course of action harmful to gun ownership.

As with all political commentary, we must note that your mileage many vary. Always remember to do you own research, never believe the drivel on the Internet or swallow the gauzy, soft-focus campaign commercials and never, ever take political advice from local outdoors columnists.

FETCH…YAAAWN…FIDO! - We loved this story: The upcoming Aug. 30 issue of Science News magazine reveals that just as yawns can be contagious from person to person, it can also spread to your canine companion.

The magazine cites a report in an upcoming issue of the journal Biology Letters where researchers found that a human yawning can cause a nearby dog to do likewise.

I mention this to prove to several buddies that my hunting dogs are just mimicking their master and not making editorial comments about his hunting ability.

        

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