Lebanon Reporter

Commentary

April 6, 2010

High tech wreck

The iPad is the newest offering by Apple genius Steve Jobs. I just read an article about it that noted, “This will totally affect your life.” I know it will change mine. The toughest part of the technological revolution for me has been coming up with plausible reasons why I’m not going to buy each new gadget.

When I was in college, I used a manual Underwood typewriter. When electric typewriters became the rage, I fought it tooth and fingernail. I asserted that there was a downside to typing faster than you can think. Computers are even speedier, so I use that excuse to explain the drivel I put out every week.

My battle with technology continued into the early ’70s, when I refused to buy Post-it notes because I felt they were a lazy way to remember things. My concerns did not make for sparkling cocktail conversation with a first date, although I didn’t have a lot of first dates. I kept forgetting to show up.

When I first heard about fax machines, I was also resistant. I finally went out and bought one in 1980, but I had nothing to fax. Thirty years later, I still don’t have anything to fax. Have you ever met me? Do I look like a person who has documents that need to get someplace in 30 seconds?

I remember the first time I saw someone with a cell phone. I was playing golf back in the early ’90s, and a guy on the third tee was calling his wife. Then his boss called him on the 4th tee. And on the next hole his dentist’s office called him. Avoiding people was the very reason I was playing golf. I relented and bought a cell phone, of course, but I haven’t learned how to fully use it. I have never taken a photo with my phone. And the only text I have ever gotten was from AT&T trying to get me to cough up the bucks for an iPhone.

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